Wednesday, May 31, 2006
我不再逃
空虚日子这一路都在熬
也许爱情就是熟能生巧
你绝对想不到我多渴望
让生活染上一些颜料
是红橙黄或蓝锭紫都好
一圈一圈的围绕
终于能自在的坦诚说爱你
***
火几时才能燃烧？

have been blogging so often nowadays!
haha
did not really keep to the promise i made in the morning
well,i did try to mug
but only manage to finish:
a ying yong wen
a zuo wen
a chi compre
and chem paper section A
feeling extremely guilty now.
***
you pissed me off
***
i miss you
:(

i want to talk to you
but do not have the courage to click your name

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

The WORD Learning Centre
a) Working Hours -0830 - 1700hrs [lunch break 1230 - 1330hrs]
b) Address - 900 South Woodlands Drive #06-02 Woodlands Civic Centre S730900
c) Contact-62194701
d) Contact Person-Melissa Seet
e) Attire-Smart Casual
f) Student Allowance-$10/- per day
g) Daily Work Scope-Administrative filing, Decorate bulletin boards, Decorate subject classrooms with interesting articles, tongue twisters, pictures, etc.

yay!am so so excited abt my job attachment!
can someone pls tell me the definition of smart casual?
:/

today will be a mugging day for me
and you better mark my words
i will start doing my piles of hols hmewrk aft blogging
and yes,i will finish a lot of stuff by today
and i must!
coz tml and fri both got paiju
i shall be and stay motivated
so that i can finish all my wrk
i shall not slack more then 5 mins at a go
i shall not give way to the tv
i shall not give way to the computer
i shall not give way to my bed
i shall DO my work and ntg else!
and i promise myself that
i shall keep to my promise
:)
***
and i like the motivated me!
if i can stay motivated like this,
then i won have to worry abt my hmewrk soon
***
this is a stupid and boring post
***
i miss you so so much,yiren!
why you like never online
and aso never reply my emails!
i desperately wants and needs to talk to you
can you please dun just disappear into the thin air like this?
:(

shall blog in the honour of you
im really disappointed in myself
i dunno what went over me whn i decided to
sink into this utter mess.
im crazy
at least i tink i am
i tried more then one time to put down
but i realised i cannot.
maybe i should follow the advice of the tarots
and let nature take its course

went back to skol today for chi oral
guess it was fine
:)
***
at first wanted to have pai ju on our own but stupid wendy din on her phone
so we could not contact her
and i waited for chuwen while she is having her toilet pai ju.
den we headed to plaza singapura!
yea.
saw two macbeths on the train.
was on a macbeth search in plaza sing
but too bad no results!
haha
***
ppl,its ok if you dun understand this post at all.
-blehs-
***
lastly,king!
must go on a macbeth search agn k?
:)

Monday, May 29, 2006

well,i have to admit i do miss everyone in bengta
and the memories we had
but i also understand that what past has past
and its impossible for the times to get back
and pls note:
me missing bengta definitely got ntg to do with ping an
i love ping an too:)

the two types of things that i cannot tolerate is
1.accusing
2.betraying
maybe i seriously should learn how to keep my mouth shut and zip it up
it will probably be the best way to protect myself against stupid stuff like these.
i dunno why i never learn frm my experience
last yr stuff was bad enough
why did i allow myself to make the same mistakes?
why did i allow myself to get into this type of mess
and be hurt again.
i really dunno who i can trust
i really dunno what i shld do
keep everything to myself?
or maybe as what king said,
talk to the mirror?
im seriously tired of this type of things
i really dun understand why ppl must backstab other ppl.
maybe on the surface this problem is not that serious,
but it is!
it means that someone had went to tell the daoyans
what we told her
its betraying of trust
if you see it frm another angle.
and its one of the two things which i cannot tolerate the most
f you,whoever you are.
get out of my life.
***
'i guess that santa's busy
coz he never comes around
i tink of him whn xmas comes to town.'
although its still far frm xmas
i want santa to be with me
at least i guess santa will never betray me.
***
all i want is a peaceful year
it need not be exciting
but why must it still be filled with problems like this?
***

Sunday, May 28, 2006

You Are Super Spicy

You're a little bit crazy, a little bit naughty, and a whole lot of sexy.You go beyond hot - you set people's senses on fire!

guess its not really true?
or maybe i have hidden 'hotness'
haha

Your Personality Is

Idealist (NF) You are a passionate, caring, and unique person.You are good at expressing yourself and sharing your ideals. You are the most compassionate of all types and connect with others easily.Your heart tends to rule you. You can't make decisions without considering feelings. You seek out other empathetic people to befriend.Truth and authenticity matters in your friendships. In love, you give everything you have to relationships. You fall in love easily. At work, you crave personal expression and meaning in your career. With others, you communicate well. You can spend all night talking with someone. As far as your looks go, you've likely taken the time to develop your own personal style. On weekends, you like to be with others. Charity work is also a favorite pastime of yours.

have been online for the whole morning
but noone else is online!
is it because its too early and everyone else is sleeping except me?
haha
my dear mons and jingying are going to china tonight/tml morning
i will miss them so much
:(
and esti is in indo now.
gosh!im so lonely:(
***
shall get offline soon
to do sum wrk
before going off to pai ju!
see ya ppl:)

Saturday, May 27, 2006

qihang is coming soon
real soon
busy.

hmmm.
haven been slacking the whole day today.
and im determined to finish at least a chinese paper one by eleven thirty!
shhh.
i shall remind focused.
only my jie ge can pei me now!
tata

i wish upon a star

shall upload some pictures here



yes!its neos taken with mons qt some time ago!
will upload those taken with esti and mons yest soon!:)

something that i heard abt but never really see

Friday, May 26, 2006

i officially announce here that i will work super hard frm tm onwards
and acheive my goals for term 3!
***
today was fun!
FUNdraising was well,FUN
although there were qt a lot of problems that happened,
we were still able to sell everything!
thats great man!
whats aft fundraising is even better!
went out with esti and mons!
went town
and did a lot of crazy things tgt
shall not list everything here
but well,
i enjoyed myself a lot a lot
(although i spent a lot a lot of money too)
and i really love you guys a lot a lot
you two make my life much more enjoyable!
yupp,i guess its only with you two that i will do all the crazy stuff!
thats a lot i wana say to you two
but i decided to keep them in my heart coz i know you will be able to sense it yea!
:)
haha.
talked to esti on the phone jus now.
realised that's the first time we talked on phone.
haha:)
had a lot of diff moods today
but its still a overall plus plus plus
+++
:))

Thursday, May 25, 2006

the term finally ended officially two hrs ago.
chem test was okay i guess.
jus find it very irritating
whn you dun seem to understand me
or even try to
i feel like we are one of the mothers and daughters in JLC
never able to truly understand each other.
you like to assume
and presume what im thinking
whn its totally not true
and i have completely no idea how to make you understand
ppl say mother and daughters have a strong bond between them
is it really true?
i really dunno
and its not like im not trying
i am
what do you expect me to do?
improve by 30 percent at a go?
or get 80 percent and 6 pts for L1R5?
its not possible
at this stage.
im fed up
i want to let you know
i want to make you understand
but how on earth am i going to do so?
can you let me know how can i make you understand that
i AM trying
and i AM improving
but its jus not possible to improve by so much at a go.
wish you can be more understanding like him.
he was really sweet
and i felt tears in my eyes whn he spoke to us.
abt how some of us are struggling AND
he have faith in us.
in case you still dunno,
i AM struggling.
but im trying
and am slowly getter out of the mess i was in in the first term.
***
shall post my holiday schedule here:
week 1:
monday-paiju
tuesday-chi oral+paiju
thursday-rehearsal
friday-paiju

week 2:
tuesday-paiju
thursday-paiju
friday-rehearsal

week 3:
tuesday-full dress
wednesday-ulu rehearsal
friday-rehearsal

SUNDAY
QIHANG:)

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

hello friend!

i know you're not feeling very happy but CHEER UP okay? you know im ALWAYS here!

and next term will be better, we cut down on shopping and study together okay! hahaha after holidays la, we enjoy holidays first!

haha hope chem went well, since you'll see this most probably only after the test.

schools out! cant wait for tomorrow xD

5 by 5
step by step
im sure i will do it
and i must

im so depressed over my ppr
i know its no use getting sad over it
coz theres ntg i can do to it now
but the problem is
i know i did try
and i know i did make an effort
but why am i still in this state?
i know i know
my overall percentage got improve
but its still terrible
too horrible to even type it out here
but my L1R5 dropped?
by two pts
wth
i feel like scolding the f word
but the most important thing is aft cursing and scolding,
what will happen to me?
how am i gg to improve?
***
feeling more calm and
qing1 xing3 now
thank god

Monday, May 22, 2006

well,i guess today's paiju was rather ok.
or maybe better than the previous one?
we need to show teachers tml
and im stressed.
hope we can do it:)
***
teyweiwei,
its not your fault.
its really not yours,
its nobody's:)
***
im slacking agn
homewrk how?
who cares?
-.-"

Sunday, May 21, 2006

you made me think abt the meaning of life once more
and i realised life is precious
and i cannot live without you
i love you,sis.

Saturday, May 20, 2006

hmmm.
xiaowei,if you happen to be here,
den this part is for you too:
okay,firstly i read your blog
and i agree exactly with what you say.
yes,we have indeed drifted
but its nobody's fault.
its jus that we are both carried away by our individual lives
two lives that are getting more and more different
until they become two lines that hardly cross.
i have expected and accepted this to happen.
well,i do miss last yr
the times we eat fried bee hoon with sauce tgt
the times we sit at the back of your classrm talking abt MKL
the times we take 86 hme tgt
the times we go compass pt tgt
the times we go chinatown tgt
the times we go kbox tgt
the times we talk abt everything under the sun
the times we laugh
and the times we cry.
esp the time i remembered so clearly,
it was last yr aft huahui camp and you were like scaring me,making me scream in the middle of compass pt

i am and will always be grateful to you
for being there with me at that point of time
two lonely souls get tgt and they are no longer lonely.
although i miss those times whn we were close
but im happy for you
happy that your life is currently gg on rather smoothly
happy that you are doing things that you like to do
happy that you are no longer lonely
and i will continue to be here for you
if you need me one day.
you can always come to me and i mean it.
i rmb a conversation we once had very clearly
you said you hope that we can remain close all the way to sec four
or maybe even aft that!
well,it seem now that we dint even meet the sec four target
but its okay.
those times will always be in our heart rite?
thank you for letting my yr 2005 be a wonderful one
and thank you for making a difference in my life.
:)
maybe we really shld try to spend more time tgt?

shall blog much more often nowadays.
haha
firstly,the previous post was by darling mons!
haha.
and jus wana clarify here,
we are NOT lesbians.
yes darling,
i will definitely share things with you next time
and i will be here for you too
:)
***
feeling super guilty now.
has been slacking the whole day and have NOT done a single piece of work
worklist for the weekend:
edit eng speech
maths hmewrk
overdue AM
study chem!
btw,choo said chem test will be very hard
:/
***
gosh my blog is getting more and more
no content!

Friday, May 19, 2006

hello dear!

haha okay i shall make it clear first before people think im really lesbian! haha xuezhen is my DEAR friend, or is it more than a friend? WAHAA xD. anyway, DEAR, if youre still sad, dont be anymore alrights? i really dont think you're that bad, have some confidence in yourself alright? you're doing perfectly fine!

you're not fun when you're low you know! must be happy always, dear! :D not only esti will be there for you, there'e me as well, as long as you're willing to share with me la. will always be here for you okay? dont be stressed!

loveeee <33

rather glad that hols are coming real soon
but guess i will be very busy too!
haha
with qihang and everything.
feeling very depressed aft paiju
feel that im not making much progress
but i really dunno what i can do
haiix
***
hes real sweet
***
i will work doubly,triply hard
next term

ok.
im here since my dear mons ask me to blog!
haha
have been trying desperately to revive my so so dead blog
changed my url and is going to change my templete...soon!
haha
btw,fixbox is no longer working.
guess i have to switch to what mons is using now.
***
ok,firstly shall blog on what happened on wednesday!
yes,its ESTI's birthday
and we(esti,me and mons)went orchard aft skol!
was sort of delayed coz her other clique wanted to celebrate with her last min!
but its okay!
as long as shes happy den its fine
anw,its only a half hr delay ma.
haha
went taka to buy some food to eat den walked all the way to far east
and indeed its damn far!(ok,i know im lame)
started shopping and trying clothes!
and we bought a ring each!
haha
a lot of details that i shall not blog here coz its too much:/
but they will forever be in my heart.
esti yi ren,
bao mu loves you
thanks for being with me the times whn i was low
-muacks-

Friday, May 12, 2006

went to the very famous colin and kero blog just now.
was rather touched by their determination
to make things right.
i admire their courage to be true to themselves.
to be honest with the fact that they are homo
and to have the strength to stand out
and create such a blog
for everyone to read
its definitely tough for them
yes,although they do receive encouragement.
but there are also many who critisized them
or even say stuff that are awful to the ears.
but they accepted graciously
without any thought of rebuking
hmmm.
although i dun exactly supprt homos
but im not against them too!
jiayou colin and kero,
do what you think is right
and things will turn out fine!
(:

slacked the whole of yest away
feeling so guilty now.
will work very very hard for the rest of the day to make up of the lost of time yest
yay!
i shall work hard and be a good good gal!:)
***
been trying desperately to change my blog layout
but being a computer idiot,
i jus carn seem to get things right
hmmpfh
can some kind soul try to help me?

Thursday, May 11, 2006

yest was a great day!
oh maybe not so great aftall
school was rather boring
the sculpture walk was boring+hot+tiring
i was like melting under the sun k?
walk and walk and walk
then listen to the stupid facilitator talk in her tamil accent
im not being racis here
but i really cannot understand what she is trying to say sometimes
which make the whole trip worse
:(
reached school at ard 1
atttended a pretty boring assembly
a talk on terrorism and stuff like that
was sleeping half way
den the girl beside me suddenly woke me up
i woke up and to my horror
mrs cheong was sitting like 1 metre away frm me
and staring like me as if my eyes had dropped off.
so in the end,cannot sleep anymore
and listened to the remaining half hr talk
:(
aft skol went j8 with mons!
was the most exciting part of the day
eat and shop and tried many clothes!
theres this very nice skirt at OP
is qt ex la
still convincing my mum to buy
haha
took neos too!
felt very stupid!
we din know the machine got two sides for you to design one!
then we were like waiting damn long for the previous grp of ppl
and the machine chose the pics for us.
we din get to choose
and ended up with damn little time to decorate
but luckily the end product was still not bad!
:)
in the end the trip proved to be rather furtile
only bought a tin of mints!
its very nice
although i shall not describe why
in case everyone starts thinking im a bimbo!
im not k?
haha.
***
long weekend
list of work:
maths
ss test
eng speech
:/

havent been blogging for a very very long time le
my previous post was actually the day before sports day?
haha.
shall continue frm there.
sports day was fun
as well as the table tennis competition b4 it.
i was like screaming my heart out.
i guess it is indeed true that you will enjoy something if you truely put your heart and soul into it.
blue house is totally amazing man!
i know it sounds kind of weird to be talking about sports day now
since it has past like for almost one month?
but i really think that blue is very united.
we moved all the way frm the inital forth place to the second place whn the results were announced.
thats a lot man
we won best overall cheer
because of our commitment and passion for our house.
not because the commitee keep asking us to cheer louder.
i have to admit that i have never gone for any recess cheer practices
but i have to let everyone know
i did cheer on sports day k?
in fact i cheered and cheered until my voice was almost gone.
it is the unity
and the commitment
that truely touched me deep in my heart.
bollywood blue
2006

my childhood.
xuezhen//*

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