Tuesday, January 30, 2007
i just wana know if you are really fine
im sorry that i wasnt able to do anything to make you feel better
just wana let you know,
i'll be here for you,if you ever need me (even if you dont even bother)
***
one thing good about nokia is that all their phones function the same way

Monday, January 29, 2007

just like that

last friday,while i was blogging something abt 一瞬间
竟然有一个人在同一时间因为某个瞬间而就这样改变了她的一生。

虽然她不是我的偶像，
甚至可以说和我一点关系都没有，
但心中却不知为什么有种莫名的悲伤

我想是一种恐惧吧。

因为真的很难确定这种事情不会发生在我身上，
或是我身边的人身上。
虽然知道一直这样想也是没用的，
但应该就是一种无助感吧！

对她来说，那明明是个普通的一天
却没想到这种事情竟然发生了。
很好奇，在车祸发生的那一刻，
她可曾想过自己会因为这样就走了。

im not totally very upset or anything
but yupp,just a tinge of sadness
although we are just strangers and people live and die everyday
but when it happen to someone whom you know (although not personally),
it just feels extra saddening.

天有不测之风云，really.

Rest in peace, is all I can say.

Sunday, January 28, 2007

i finally finally finished my ju ben!~
:D

shall go sleep soon!
haha:P

stuff to do for the rest of the work:
-study ss
-3 chi reflections+cover page
-all overdue homework

stuff to look forward to:
-my new phone!:DDD

shall seriously get to my ju ben
and not slacking
i think i gonna die soon
dint do any work at all yest
except one chi reflection
and thats so pathetic
):

aim for today:
-COMPLETE JU BEN!
-one chi reflection(or maybe 2?)
-study ss!:D

Saturday, January 27, 2007

i dont deny that i am pretty happy now
see?
just a small action from you can make me happy
***
watched sheng ri kuai le today
its good
i like the 拍摄手法！
just find the plot a bit typical
but its touching and sweet anyway:D

Friday, January 26, 2007

喜欢在夜晚时乘搭巴士
喜欢看着窗外原本熟悉的景物因为黑暗的夜晚而变得陌生
尤其是几个小时前明明一切还是如此的不一样。
好奇妙
总觉得太阳下山的那一刻真的好神奇
就因为那短短的一瞬间，一切变得完全不一样
生命或许也会因为某些瞬间而彻底地改变，
变得和前一秒钟完全不同。

也喜欢在巴士上听着别人的对话
不否认，或许因为这样能带给我一种偷窥的快感。
想要了解别人的生活是否暗示着我厌倦了自己的生活，
或是因为，我只是想过过别人的生活罢了。
看着一个人，就能看出他的个性吗？
我常常试着凭感觉而猜测一个人的个性
甚至开始幻想他的生活是怎样过的。
无聊的是，他们全都是路人

世界这么大，
即使只是擦肩而过的陌生人应该也需要一种缘分
不然你怎么会这么巧地和我一样生活在新加坡？
甚至在同一时间，
搭同一趟巴士。

曾和我搭过巴士的陌生人，
真抱歉，
你们都已经在不知不觉中成了我观察的对象！
谢谢这份缘分吧!
***
透过玻璃窗，看着街上的路人，
总觉得自己好像是从另一个角度看他们
和自己的世界离得太远了
***
我还是必须说，
我还是在乎。
只是你都不闻不问了，
我又还能怎样？

-静静的-
空气里躲着什么 有点浪漫的心动
我偷偷看你 你也偷偷看我
世界上多了什么 好象变得很不同
站在你身边 这一切都很宽阔
我还在等着你 静静的爱我
只要有你陪我 静静的就足够
你也在等着我 静静的温柔
就这样手牵手 静静的看着天空
心里面藏着什么 你只想要让我懂
原来我的梦 也就是你的梦
纸条上写了什么 我好想要听你说
让字字句句 充满我们的笑容
我还在等着你 静静的爱我
只要有你陪我 静静的就足够
你也在等着我 静静的温柔
就这样手牵手 静静的看着天空
永远要记得那天彼此许下的承诺
瞬间点亮的火花是我们的拥有
我还在等着你 静静的爱我
只要有你陪我 静静的就足够
你也在等着我 静静的温柔
就这样手牵手 静静的看着天空
静静的手牵手 是最简单的梦

Thursday, January 25, 2007

i guess maybe i should just really REALLY let go
nothing will come out of it im sure
even if there will be someone beside you,
it won be me,never.
you dont even seem to care
why am i still so silly to be holding on?

whatever.i guess im just unable to let go
at least not yet.
***
no more test tmr
feel kind of relieved
all i need to do tonight is the damn eng graded compre!
YAY!:D

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

im preparing myself to die for chemistry test tmr
should be studying now
but i cannot get my ass off the comp
shall go off soon
byebye

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

chinese test tmr
hate it cause theres 默写

“先天下之忧而忧，后天下之乐而乐”
“天将降大任于是人也，必先苦其心志，劳其筋骨，饿其体肤，空乏其身”
and my personal favourite,
"饱食终日，无所用心，难埃哉”
and now the problem is,
i dont know who said what:/

lit test tmr too
i think i will just die
how am i going to write sooo long
what if i got not enough time?
what if i dont even understand the poem?
okay,shall stop thinking abt the what ifs

two tests tmr
thats just the wonderful life of being a sec 4
but on the brighter side,
at least i can be rather free by tmr 10am.
wish me luck people

and i still haven completed my ju ben
got terribly stuck
need to think of how to untie to knot
sorry people for being ultra late:(

Monday, January 22, 2007

天使
by 五月天　
你就是我的天使
保护著我的天使
从此我再没有忧伤
你就是我的天使
给我快乐的天使
甚至我学会了飞翔
飞过人间的无常
才懂爱才是宝藏
不管世界变得怎么样
只要有你就会是天堂
像孩子依赖著肩膀
像眼泪依赖著脸庞
你就像天使一样
给我依赖
给我力量
像诗人依赖著月亮
像海豚依赖海洋
你是天使
你是天使
你是我最初和最后的天堂

before i start off,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY,CHU!<3

so i guess maths test is just screwed up
but its predictable so im fine with it
never put in much effort=lousy results
nevermind,i shall work hard for the rest of the tests this week!
chem,lit and chi!
i promise to do well:D

life seems to be surrounded with the same stuff everyday
i think its time for me to learn how to 忙里偷闲
i just refused to get too choked up with sch work!:D

off to do my ju ben!
tata~

Friday, January 19, 2007

i hope i won feel like giving up halfway lar
i have to admit,im feeling slightly uncertain abt it
but since i guess its probably the one and only chance
may as well do the best i can
and not leave any regrets

看着窗外的雨，
不知道你是否也在和我想你一样想着另一个她？
***
"两只恋人"

傻傻两个人 许过一个愿
当时星星眨著眼 看起来并不远

为你长翅飞 为你被风吹
请你千万要等我
带幸福来给你的那一天

春天散步夏天看海秋天数落叶
一直没有烦恼 一直没有争吵
让 每天像糖一样甜

冬天飘雪我是棉被温暖你的夜
一直在你身边 一直爱到永远
你 就负责靠著我的肩

贴著你的脸 拍一张照片
世界是很复杂的 要靠我近一点

但愿你每天 幸福又安全
两只恋人手牵手
谁也不用再跑给谁去追
***
如果一切爱情都如此简单那该多好
但我相信还是会有如此单纯的恋爱的
等着寻找我的另外一“只”他。
***
生日快乐
most probably will catch it when its out
比好朋友还好的朋友到底会跨越界限吗?
***
maybe you did care
but i guess its all over now on your part
i should just be glad that at least you cared
at least i mattered to you:)
***
had always wanted it to be over
but now when things seem to get more 平淡
im actually not happy with the current state either
do i really want to be all miserable over you again
i really dont know
***
okay,physics test was fine!
im still trying real hard to cope with all the stress and stuff
but im sure i will manage somehow:D

Monday, January 15, 2007

i ought to be studying my social studies now
or at least completing my homework
but i carn seem to be able to pull myself away from the comp
i will succeed somehow...soon
i need to admit
im a bit worried
or in fact im very worried about how the rest of this year will be
as in my studies and everything
i once thought of just giving up all my commitments (cca etc)
you may argue that i dont have much commitments in the first place
that i will have to agree
but it seems to me that i may be unable to cope now even with my little commitments
i wonder how those with many do that
and later on with qihang nearing,im sure things will be worse
ohwells,but at least im not doing anything MAJOR for qihang
so i will find a way to cope somehow
one thing for sure,
i will not give up things that i enjoy doing
no matter how hard it will be.

Sunday, January 14, 2007

妳坐在我身边 可是表情很不自然　　
聊的话很平凡 却很悲伤　　　　
妳说妳不相信 活着就是为了梦想　　
甚至妳更怀疑 什么是地久天长　　　　
咖啡麻醉不了孤单 只会让心更烫　　
哦 都一样
所谓梦想 终究飘飘荡荡　　
在迷乱的台北流浪 寻找一个幻想　　
突然很渴望在我身上
找到妳要的靠岸　　　　
这一刻 当我们都感觉到彼此的心愿　　
爱情早已经开始 思念早已经蔓延　　　　
咖啡麻醉不了孤单 只会让夜更长　　
我 也一样 飘飘荡荡 眼神交换迷惘　　
在冷漠的台北流浪 找一个避风港　　
突然很渴望在妳身上
也找到我要的 靠岸　
《靠岸》

suddenly like this song alot alot
***
maybe i should just try no to give myself too much stress.
hopefully continue doing the things i like will help me cope with my sec 4 year
i will never give up
yes.

　

Saturday, January 13, 2007

so it went one whole round
but its back to you again
i guess its not easy to just get over like this
theres still part of me holding on to the feeling
but maybe things will be gone soon
i hope so

Friday, January 12, 2007

you;
firstly,im sorry that im not able to make you feel better
i hope you can understand that im really helpless
i dont know what to say
and i dont know how to say either
its not like im unwilling to listen or cheer you up
i tried but it got worse instead
maybe you can say that i have never been through stuff like these before
and that i will have to admit
but i really hope you are feeling better now
maybe as you said,leaving you alone may be a better way
and i hope that is true too
maybe its just the same feeling whenever we feel helpless about you-know-what
yupp,i think its most probably the same
but i REALLY hope you can understand that i still care loads k?
i guess we all have moments like these when maybe its best to be alone
have a good night rest,dear.
im sure you will feel much better tmr.
maybe its just because im never good at comforting people with words.
i mean,you know that
but i really want you to be okay
cheer up please!<333

Thursday, January 11, 2007

i guess im no longer as confused as i was yesterday
will just see how things go,seriously.
***
感觉有时候不需要太浓烈
淡淡的也不错
虽然我还是没有办法很确定的说，
我已经忘记一切了
但，
淡淡的真的也不错。
突然觉得身体少了一块负担
真的好轻。
***
im sure i won be able to do well
but i will just do what i can
i cannot say that i have put in a lot of effort for this test
but i will try my best,
really.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

im not really sure why im feeling this way
and i cant explain how im feeling now too
maybe its just that i dont know why the feeling can just fade away within such a short period of time
when i used to be all miserable over you
yes,i knew right from the beginning that it will just be a passing phrase
and i will definitely get over you sooner or later
but as time goes by,it seems that i have gotten used to liking you
to look out for you in the crowd
to watch for your every movement
to even be happy when you just talk to me
and now when it seems that the feeling is gone
i feel weird
thats this sense of emptiness within me
its like,i feel empty now because you occupied quite a part of my life
although i knew right from the start,i will get over you
but when this day comes,it just feels...weird
im doubting myself
maybe the feeling wasnt as strong as i thought it was
but if thats the case,wasnt i being silly for hurting because of you?
im glad because i think i found back a friend
i have to admit our friendship was more or less affected because of my feelings towards you
at least it is,on my part.
that day when we were talking,i suddenly realised,
there seems to be no more ... feeling for me
i just treated you as a friend and talked to you as a friend
then i thought maybe it was a step to get over you
the only thing i din realise was that maybe,
i was over you already.
the line between liking you or just liking you as a friend seems to be blurred
i find myself unable to differentiate my feelings towards you anymore
maybe its just a sign that im REALLY over you.
it feels like even if someone chants your name 1o times in front of me,
i may not feel anything...anymore
but yet its irony because i cannot be sure
im not sure if im really really over you
or im just tired of it all already
im afraid H will just be someone to help me get over you
or maybe H is just an excuse i give myself for getting over you
i once said i will never fall for someone whom i dont know
but it seems that its not quite true now
i dont like it at all
i dont understand why i can change soo quickly
like it was only one week ago when i was still quite dee about you.
but one thing i can be sure is that,
i will never get too serious about H
in the sense that,i dont think it will be possible for me to be miserable over H or something
lets hope what M said will be true,
may H be just someone whom we will talk about.
nothing more than that.
no matter what,
you already have a special place in my heart
even if im over you
im sure i will never forget you
even 20 years down the road.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

i just woke up from my nap
feeling terribly guilty cause im supposed to be doing work now
nevermind,shall work hard later on.
***
whats yours will be yours
no matter how long it will take to come

Saturday, January 06, 2007

(edited)/
maybe there won be more tears than smiles,
but even so,we cannot deny that those happy moments seem to be shorter
and those sad ones seem to last much longer
but when we were young,things were never like that
maybe theres just the way life is
we need to constantly find things that we can be happy about
even if its just small little things in our lives
we really need to appreciate.


Someone once told me, when one sighs, (s)he kills an angel. It seems pretty sad how innocent angels get killed by the complicated and cruel world us human live in, indirectly.

-from mons blog

the world is real complicated
the many problems we face in our lives make us lose the innocence we once had as a child
we begin to doubt the people in our lives
we learn not to trust people too easily
and soon there will be more sighs than laughter
more tears than smiles
and one day,we will realise,
we have lost the ability to smile forever
i always thinks that children are like angels
they live life happily,without needing to worry about anything
they smile and laugh all they want
even those tears come and go in a flash
maybe when we sigh,we are not only killing an angel
we are also killing the angel in us
the innocent child in us that we once had

Friday, January 05, 2007

okay.the first few days of school have gone pretty well
i have not felt so positive and motivated for a long time already
but as mons said,im a bit worried that my motivation will wear off soon
and by the time the Os come,i will just drop dead.
really hope that will not be the case
hope that my motivation will last
and i promise i will try not to give myself too much stress
must learn to manage my time well
will definitely not give up on my leisure time just because of studies!
hais
i guess a lot of my future posts will just be me talking to myself
think i really need the encouragement to hang on
OKAY.this is only the third day of school so i shall not sound as if im already dying:D
***
anyway,the feeling of being a SEC FOUR has not really sunk in yet
it feels really different from being a sec 3
i cannot believe i have actually been in st nicks for 3 years and 3 days le.
it seems only yest when i was a sec 1
dont know why,but i kind of feel old
its like after next year,i will say byebye to stnicks and go to somewhere else
its kind of sad even when i think abt it now
i really dont know how i will handle everything when the time comes
went to central for lunch today aft sch with mons
we were chatting as usual and i forgot what she said
but it suddenly dawned on me that
after this year,it seems almost impossible to go home with her everyday and lunch with her as and when we like.
thats really sad
i dont know what else i can say
but i will definitely miss you darling<3
and esti,chu,whoever made a difference in my secondary school life.
shall end this post in a happy tone
bye people
im gonna mug hard this weekend
***
jiayou huahui for cca fair tmr.
its my last year as a member and i wana be proud of huahui:D

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

first

its ironic how my previous entry was called last and now this is "first"
haha
so today is the first day of school
and surprisingly,i dont have any special feeling of it being the FIRST day of school
im not sure if its good or bad.
does it shows that im prepared for the new year already?
or does it shows that im just numbed towards school already?
if i dont have the "refreshed" feeling now,then will i be able to hang on to the end of the year?
will i just not be able to cope with the stress and just break down in between?
i pray for the best
***
shall be hardworking
off to study in a whiles time
and i think i 染上恶习 this holidays ):
shall stop my neopet ing habit
yes,laugh all you want!:(

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

last

so today is the last day of everything
from tmr onwards,i think i will be mugging my head off everyday
or at least i will try to
thats one of my new year's resolution too!
honestly,im supposed to be studying now
like getting prepared for the new year and stuff like that
but how can i spend my last day of holidays studying?
thats like crazy.
anyway,this holidays seem to be over in a flash
i guess i was rather busy with a number of diff stuff
such as playwright,drama camp,cip...
and as a result,i dont think i got the rest that i deserve
i wonder when will be the next time i can have a longg holiday all to myself
to really have a nice longg break and do what i want
i admit,this is bad
how can i be looking forward to another holiday when my this holiday is not even over yet
i must find the determined me
yes,i must study harder and do well in my work
i guess i just need to worry abt the study harder part
cause if i study harder,i naturally will do well in my work right?
it sounds so easy,but i cannot be sure how it will be to do.
nevermind,i will try my best,i promise

thats my new year's resolution btw!

Monday, January 01, 2007

so i broke my promise,
my part 2 was not put up before 2007 comes!
and before i know it,its 2007 already!
so firstly,HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!:D

and i wana take back my words
2006 is not only about you
definitely.
the happy moments,the tears.
all the times when i feel like giving up
especially in the first half of the year
the time when i was extremely stressed,yet could not find an outlet to release my stress
thanks for those who were with me all these while
im really thankful to all of you

you; i dont know what else to say besides thank you.
really,you taught me to be stronger if not anything else
i still remember those encouragement,those support that you given me when i was really on the verge of breaking down.
be it the qihang period,or those few times when something happened to my family,
you are always the first one who came to my mind.
its true,you aspire me to be stronger
to learn to face with problems
thanks for making my 2006 a better year.
i cannot never say enough thanks to you i guess
so yupp,i love you:)
and i promise i won laugh at your nails anymore:P

and you;
if esti is the one i always approach regarding family stuff,
then i think you are the one i always approach abt ahem stuff
its nice hanging out with you
thanks for listening to me repeating abt the same stuff over and over again
thanks for going home with me(although we only take to mrt tgt)
thanks for drinking bubble tea with me(the jeremy incident)
thanks for all those memories created
i love you too<33

besides thank you,i would also like to say sorry to both of you
sorry for bringing you guys trouble
sorry for the times when i could not do anything to help you

2006 has been great in a special way
and i hope 2007 will be great too.

HELLO 2007!

***
2006 is the year when i realised,
music can really be my source of strength
it may sound silly,but there was this period of time when it was his music that gave me the strength to continue on.
times when happy or sad,i can always relate to music
so i hope 2007 will be a year with more good music!:D
(omg.i think i sound like a wei da de musician:P)
***
i really hope 2007 will be a blastful year
hopefully one year later,i will be able to be here blogging about how great 2007 is!:D

my childhood.
xuezhen//*

plugs.
Sign my Guestbook
Read my Guestbook
red bellies; anges; cecilia; chuwen; cynthia; esti; fiona; harkhui; jenny; jiayi; jiehui; jieying; joanne; kahyee; kemin; laypeng; melissa; monica; myra; pingan; pohting; serene; suwi; xiaowei; yuensin;

March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
August 2007

credits.
blogskins greene_sprit host